Thursday, February 10, 2011

Happy Single's Day

Yes, it is the every single unattached person's nightmare aside from a wedding.

That's right, It is Valentine's Day...again.

Recently, I am going to call him an acquaintance from high school, made contact with me and we began talking and just being friends.  He would text me in the morning when he got home from his job that was a grocery truck un-loader in Ferguson.

Now mind you he has issues....lots of them.

But I was just being a friend and listening ear.  I invited him to come visit, just to give him a chance to get out of Ferguson, and  to see Utah.  He won't commit, he has all kinds of excuses, but he continues to make the plans.  Finally when the deadline was coming to get the cheaper ticket, he gets a DUI.  (One of his issues.)  And of course I was not holding my breath because I was getting all kinds of stories.  And it was fine that he wasn't coming, because life in my house was getting ready to change.  So I went on with my life and continued to text and talk with him.

Then suddenly he grew quiet.  I tried texting him, calling him. But not one answer.  I tried once a week.

And then on Tuesday afternoon, I get a text from him that says "Leave me alone, don't talk to me or contact me again. I am in a serious relationship."  Of course my response was from shock, "What the hell did I do, FRIEND?"  He says "Just leave me alone and don't contact me again. I'm sorry"  Now I am pissed.  So I tell him to F off and "I sure hope she can deal with your self pity drunkenness." He thinks he can get me by saying " F you. I hope you eat yourself as big as a blimp."  I laugh, this does not bother me in the least bit.  Me: " That didn't hurt.  At least I know how to live." And then the girlfriend steps in and I just wish her luck.

Because she is going to need it.

He has wallowed in self-pity, drunkenness, I-am-the-victim mentality since his wife left him over 10 years ago.  He hasn't had any kind of significant relationship since that time. He hasn't improved his life in any way.  I guess he should go eat worms.... oops sorry, my dad would sing that to us, when we were little ans whining about nobody liking us.

I have worked hard over the years to change myself. To be happy with the hand I am holding right now, but I am always drawing new cards.  It is not easy, believe me.  I still have my days.  I am facing a hard hand now on the eve of my next birthday.

Valentine's Day is STUPID!

I don't need Valentine' day to know I am special or that I matter in someone's life.  I see it everyday when one of my students understands the concept I just taught them, or when my little dogs all run to my room, knowing it is time for snuggling in bed.  Or when my nephews and niece run and greet me as I walk in the door.

I don't need Valentine's day let someone know I love them.   I let them know everyday of the year.  Its by the little things that we do for each other.

And I DON'T NEED a man.

I never said I didn't want one....LOL!

So my many readers (lol)  Happy Single's Day!!!

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